A Post About Loading the Dishwasher. (Seriously.)

There is a very specific way in which I load my dishwasher. Not because I’m a control freak, but because this way works for getting the most dishes possible in the dishwasher so as not to waste precious water.

I’ve showed my husband countless times how to properly load our dishwashers and honestly? It’s super easy! Cups and glasses on side top rack. Bowls in the middle, plates at the bottom, DISHWASHER LOADING BASICS. And yet, every single time he loads the dishwasher, he puts everything in the wrong place. This wouldn’t be a big deal if he was able to fit most of the dishes, but the way he stacks it, he only can fit about 8 things. I end up having to go rearrange everything to make more room.

“Why don’t you load it the way I’ve showed you 500 times?”

His response is always something along the lines of “Well, if you don’t like it, why don’t you load it yourself?”

Which, give me a break. I DO the load the dishwasher myself most of the time. The few times you do load it, WHY CAN’T YOU DO IT THE RIGHT WAY? Or even the sort of right way?

Is he doing this on purpose? Is he just trying to annoy me? Is it possibly he has a Dish Washing Impairment? Or am I the one with the problem? Do I need to just let him stack that crap anyway he wants to and not worry about all of the water that will be wasted because of his refusal to DO IT RIGHT?

I don’t know man. I just don’t know.

This post has been brought to you by 22 years of marriage.

22 thoughts on “A Post About Loading the Dishwasher. (Seriously.)

  1. T

    Ha! I’m with you on this one (typed as I’m cringing listening to my husband load the dishwasher…). I say Dish Washing Impairment. I know my husband thinks I’m crazy for loading the dishwasher a particular way but it IS more efficient. Although, now he has gone way to the other end of the spectrum and seriously overloads it. I just have to take a deep breath….but I still re-do load it when it gets to be too much!

    Reply
  2. Cheryl

    For the entire 6 years we’ve been married my husband has loaded the dishwasher wrong but at least he does it. That’s good enough for me. Laundry is where he is not allowed to go. I do think they do some things wrong on purpose just so they can get out of having to ever do it again.

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  3. Mommabird2345

    I think it’s a little “do it wrong so I don’t have to do it again” and a little dish washing impairment. What irritates me is this, my family can get clean dishes out of the dishwasher knowing exactly where things are located, b/c they’re always in the same place on the rack. How hard is it to reload it the same way?? I really don’t understand it.

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  4. smart aleck

    My husband declared the dishwasher his domain when we redid our kitchen, so no matter how crazily he loads it, I look the other way. Except when he throws the scrubber brush loaded with regular detergent in there. Just keep your paws off my laundry ( he rebels by doing this, too…I try to separate the stuff in advance and hide my nice clothes from him).
    His dad doesn’t do any housework, so I bite my tongue a lot.

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  5. Theresa

    Hahahaha. OMG I’ve had this conversation in my head SO many times and it’s only been 6 years of marriage for us! See, the thing is, it’s his chore to do the dishes. I do all the cooking so he does the dishes – that’s our deal. But he does them wrong! He loads the dishwasher like your husband does when I prefer to do it your way, because obviously that’s the right way. It takes every fiber of my being not to correct him and/or rearrange the dishwasher every night. Every. Single. Fiber. I kind of suspect husbands do chores badly on purpose in the hopes that we’ll just do it for him, but I have realized it’s at least partly me. I will admit I’m a total control freak so I am tempted to tell him he does EVERYTHING wrong just because he doesn’t do it my way. My solution is just to walk away. If I don’t watch him do it and the dishes end up clean, I can live with it. (But sometimes I still rearrange the dishes when he’s not looking ;)

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  6. Nina

    Dish Washing Impairment. My husband has it, too. And he’ll run it with like 4 things in there because he “couldn’t fit anything else.” Wasting water AND detergent.

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  7. Leigh

    I think there should be some sort of class that husbands and children have to attend that teaches them (a) how to load the dishwasher, (b) how to put a roll of toilet paper on the holder for the love of Pete why do you just set it on the top?, and (c) how to fold towels.

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  8. Kate

    Oooh, I *hate* that.

    I did read once that you can either tell a spouse to do something or tell him or her how to do it, but not both. I’ve found it helpful.

    Reply
  9. jenfromboston

    This….speaks to me.

    Also, spoons and forks for up, knives downward.

    My guy also DWI (dishwasher inpaired), although I tend to bite my tongue as he does more than the lion’s share of cooking and dishwashing ( the by hand – kind). He also puts large items in there, which should just get handwashed b/c they take up too much space.
    All this to say: THERE IS A RIGHT WAY, PPL.

    Reply
  10. Sarahviz

    It’s total role reversal at my house – my husband yells at me constantly about loading the dishwasher inefficiently – but in my defense, I totally don’t do it on purpose – my brain just doesn’t work that way! Apparently I have no spatial conception whatsoever!

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  11. steen

    Don’t be fooled. It’s part of his master plan to get out of having to load the dishwasher! Screw it up enough times and he thinks you’ll let him off the hook. BE STRONG.

    Reply
  12. Julie

    I am so right there with you on this. My husband loads the front of the dishwasher first, or puts things in there so randomly it is impossible to load anything else. I like things in order!
    Plus, if it doesn’t fit in the dishwasher, he just feels like it can wait and go in a future load instead of washing the darn thing by hand. Ugh! Really? Talk about a waste of water and electricity.
    Now, can we talk about overloading the washing machine so that the clothes don’t get clean?

    Reply
  13. Suzy Q

    This is one of the few good things about living alone. The dishwasher is always loaded correctly. However, I do tend to overload it!

    Reply
  14. Dyane

    Mine does it, too, and then doesn’t run it, so the dishes sit in there, with me thinking they’re clean, until I open it to put them away. He also can’t put them away in the right places, no matter how many times I tell him where everything goes.

    Reply
  15. rach

    My boyfriend also suffers from this problem. The only solution we’ve found is that I load, and he unloads. He still moans about that, though.

    Reply
  16. Madeleine

    Ah, seems to be a very common problem – I have heard many a moan on this very topic. We don’t have a dishwasher – I don’t think our marriage could cope with the strain.

    Reply
  17. mart

    Yes, it’s a ploy, husbands also can’t fold towels, sort socks, or change poopie diapers. …. they don’t know how. ….. yeah, right! But they can be engineers and inspectors! I’ve learned these things from 25 years of marriage! Lol but, I wouldn’t trade him for anything!

    Reply

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