I’m Pretty Sure I’m Going To Need An Assembly Line of Shoulders To Cry on in Exactly Six Months From Today

Today is September 3rd.
Which means today my first born child is exactly 6 months away from his 18th birthday.
Which means in exactly 6 months I will be the mother of an adult human being.
An adult human being who can use the phrase “YOU CAN’T STOP ME! I’M 18!” if he wants to.
To which I could respond “well then, you can start paying for your own place and your own groceries, Mr. Adult Man!” if I wanted to.
I hope he never does and I hope I never do, because I’m dreading those kind of conversations with my LEGAL ADULT HUMAN BEING.
Other things I dread are more serious, like, my son apparently having made up his mind that he wants to attend a law enforcement academy this fall because he wants to be a cop. He’s been saying that for a while, but I’ve been hoping he’ll change his mind.
All indications are that he’s not going to change his mind. He’s talking about it more and more and telling me the classes he wants to take and criminal justice this and police academy that and oh my delicate heart can not take it because it is too overwhelmed with both pride and fear. At the same time. Because good for you for wanting to protect and serve, son. But also? You could get shot and killed so choose something else please, son.
I swear to Regis Philbin that just yesterday we were having conversations about Teenage Mutant Ninja turtles and how many tickets he had saved for that one prize he was trying to earn at Chuck E Cheeses. And today, we’re talking about graduation and THE POLICE ACADEMY. What? How is this possible?
I try to look at the bright side.
He’ll be earning his own money! He’ll be experiencing the world and all that it has to offer! He’ll be doing important things that will make a difference in this world!
I remember being that age. I remember how excited I was to be so close to graduating and living my life (and for me? “living my life” pretty much meant “marrying PigHunter so I could have all of the sex I wanted every single day!)
I am happy for my son and looking forward to watching him be the man that I’ve raised him to be. But at the same time… tears. So many tears. Because even though I know that in my heart he will always remain my sweet baby boy, the reality is that he is just six months away from being a legal adult.
Good for him. Bad for my heart.
Man, I miss those days.
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16 thoughts on “I’m Pretty Sure I’m Going To Need An Assembly Line of Shoulders To Cry on in Exactly Six Months From Today

  1. Wacky Mommy

    We need good cops, good teachers, good soldiers, but I want to scream “NO” too every time someone mentions going into those fields. He’s going to make good decisions, he will follow his heart, he’ll use his brain and his passion and his wits. You and Tony have done a good job raising him, remember that always.

  2. Dawn

    Boy do I have some good news for you!!!! I don’t think they can become police officers until they are 21. LOL. There are a few ways they can go to get started in the career…school, academy etc.
    My son (who is already 20!!!! so I’m getting scared..) is working on his AOJ degree at a community college. The career is a good fit for him and I can see why he is attracted to it, but I keep trying to point out what I perceive to be the less dangerous police jobs… My latest is…”hey, isn’t a game warden a police officer?” Or “what about being a Sheriff that patrols the rivers?”
    And…I work at a community college and I know all too well… They change their minds!!!! So maybe, just maybe…he’ll start down that path and find something more interesting. :-)

  3. Kami

    When my daughter turned 18 all we heard was “I’m 18″. Well my youngest was almost 4 and she would say “she’s 18″ anytime we had a discussion about her doing something, LOL!
    Oh and the cop thing, my son is 17 he comes from a cop family…grandfather, father, two uncles, and a cousin-all cops. We’re scared too. I say it’s in their blood. Sighs.

  4. Vickie

    I had to laugh at two lines:
    a) YOU CAN’T STOP ME! I’M 18! ( I still remember hearing, “YOU CANT STOP ME! IM 12! AND 13! AND 14! etcetcetc…..
    b)”He’ll be 18 and he’ll earn his own money!”
    hahahahahahahahahahahahahah JUST WAIT!!! IT NEVER ENDS KID….you will be their bank forever!

  5. Laura in Michigan

    Yes, my son tells me every chance he can that he is a “grown man” and I respond the same way you will. And trust me, your son will tell you that every chance he can too. It is a rite of passage!!! He sounds like such a good boy though, so he will get over it quickly!!

  6. Kyla

    Awww! Can’t believe your baby is so grown up now. I can hardly believe mine is in 3rd grade this year, I can’t imagine when he becomes an ADULT.

  7. Suzy Q

    My sister’s been a cop for 20 years. It took about 4 or 5 years before we all stopped freaking out every damn day when she was on duty. You’ll get used to it. Sort of. However, I do NOT recommend you ever ride with him (some PDs allow that) when he’s on duty.
    PS: I totally stole your “Who needs pockets when you have cleavage?” line from your Twitter and put in on my Facebook. Love!

  8. Julie

    Wow, 18 is scary. I can barely handle 5. It sounds like you have raised a great boy, and I’m sure he will make smart decisions. And if you ever want him to talk to someone whom is in the biz, let me know. I have my BS in Criminal and my Masters in Forensics.

  9. badgermama

    Oh WOW. It gives me shivers! I can’t even imagine. I would also feel really proud of that as an ambition, but scared for the harsh reality of that job.
    7 more years till I release my creature into the wild… I’m right behind you!

  10. Jackie

    I know your pain. Mine started college this year. I’m sorry. It’s exciting and heart wrenching all in one.
    Hang in there!
    Jackie

  11. Brenda

    Just wait til your baby boy is expecting his first baby! It is an awesome journey because when they become “of age” their relationship with you becomes even more valuable because you know it is by their choice. Cried at 18, 21 and his wedding… hope I don’t cry in two weeks when I hold my son’s baby. Hang in there… it is worth it.

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