The One That Should Be Flagged For Excessive Use of the Word “Tagline.”

“How do you come up with the taglines for your blog?” A curious reader asked.
“Mostly from comments left here.” I replied.
I can’t express how much I love the comments that are left here. Some of my favorite things to say in my real life have been things people have said to me here.
And as much as I hate to say it, my favorite are almost always from Random Assholes (aka: TROLLS.)
(Or, like all the cool kids on the internet say “The Haters Who Are Just Jealous.”)
Don’t get me wrong– I don’t dwell on the mean, nasty, negative comments. As another blogger once told me “Ignore those people. Don’t feed into their negativity.” (Weird. That person now has an entire site dedicated to The Hate, but, I’M NOT JUDGING.)
(I’m just jealous.)
Err, what was I saying again? Oh, yes! While I don’t dwell on the negative comments, I most certainly do find humor in them. And some of them have been, as my husband’s Psycho-Ex once wrote in his yearbook, “permanently inscribed on my heart and soul.”
Like these:
“You deserve everything you have… AND LESS!!!!!!!!!”
“I’d slap that cookie out of your hand!!”
“There goes those damn RENTERS!”
“check your ass to see how many pounds you gain watching that Tv.”
“You are all addicted to those lakers and to that Kolbe”
Those are the few that I remember and that I will occasionally use in Real Life Conversations.
I’m not saying every troll comment is “hilarious.” Some have been cruel. Some have been hateful. Some have made me physically shake from anger. (Because, say what you want about me, I can take it. LEAVE MY KIDS OUT OF IT.)
But, for the most part, those types of comments are so absurd, you can’t help but laugh.
Here is The One that inspired my current tagline:

Losers cry and eat/waste money on bean dip/gameshowtryouts etc. , If you love your kids so much, go do something about it. Winners do the math , suck it up and think about what matters and take care of business. If you polled the people that have replied to your post, probably 60% own thier home, they didnt do anything special (like win the lottery or win on some gameshow), they just put thier home/kids above the me, me. $8a day on starbucks/beandip is $2920 a year x (times) how ever many years you have been wasting money on rent/beandip. Not to mention that it had to cost something out of pocket to travel around to meet people from the internet, and interview Elaine from Sienfield. Egocentricity should be thy middle name , if you only got paid $10.00 an hourfor every hour you have spent BLOGGING or reading BLOGS or met other renters who BLOG, I am willing to wager you would have quite the down payment.

The fact that someone actually took the time to write that, to DO THE BEAN DIP MATH, still blows my mind. And it still makes me laugh.
Which is why it’s my tagline, two years later.
I don’t think that turning those type of comments into taglines equals “feeding into the negativity.” I think it’s “turning a negative into a positive” or “making lemonade out of blog comment lemons” if you will.
Is there a point to this post? Because “trolls give good tagline?”
Yes. There is.
I did the math.
2 years+ same tagline= time for a new one.

23 thoughts on “The One That Should Be Flagged For Excessive Use of the Word “Tagline.”

  1. Cheri

    Oh my! Some people really shouldn’t really should learn to use their time better. Bean dip = not owing a home. In what universe did that math make sense?? Great way to use it to your advantage in some way.

  2. TJ

    I wish I could come up with something unintentionally hilarious for you, but I don’t think I have the troll mindset required to be dead serious in my attempted meanness only to have everyone laugh at how ridiculous I am.

  3. Nicki

    Huh. You need to spend more time with me. I have the nicest readers! (And while I can’t offer bean dip…I’m a queso girl…there are kinder gentler loving responses to my posts.)
    Take care!

  4. Mon

    I find it funny that they think there is an official category of “renters who blog”. Which is also a good band name.

  5. KarateMom

    What I don’t understand is why people who apparently dislike you, a person they have never met, would take the time to write nasty comments! I mean, really! If you hate it so much, STOP READING!
    I, on the other hand, think you’re wonderfabulawsos! (My daughter came up with that word…a combo of wonderful, fabulous, and awesome!)

  6. ben

    Has it really been TWO years since I visited? I’m reading this (over at bloglines) and I’m thinking “I can’t remember the tagline.” And it felt like in school when the class starts and the first thing the teacher says is “Take everything off your desk except for a clean sheet of paper and a pencil. Now, class? What is the Joy Unexpected tagline? You have one minute. GO.”
    Like that.
    Finally, if it weren’t for trolls, we wouldn’t have nearly as much to talk about.

  7. Meg

    HAHA! That is awesome! I don’t get a lot of trolls on my blog, but the nasty comments ALWAYS become household taglines, spelling errors included!

  8. Burgh Baby

    I’ve been reading for years and yet I STILL can’t figure out why people care if you rent or own or sleep on the backs of tiny invisible unicorns while they gallop across a sea of bean dip. So. Weird.

  9. WhichBox

    I can’t believe it’s been two years!! I still remember that comment. Seriously, you’d be one gassy person at $8 worth of bean dip a day. I love that comment sooo much.

  10. Issa

    Trolls give good tagline…that made me snort. I am horrible at taglines. I did some stupid contest just to make others come up with mine.
    Best troll comment I ever got was a person who told me: No woman ever gets morning sickness before 8 weeks of pregnancy.
    She went on to say I’d faked a miscarriage. Which was SO f’ing lovely. However, that part of her comment still cracks me up though. I think I got jipped each time. Maybe my babies need to be grounded because they didn’t follow the in-utero rules.

  11. JenniferB

    Oh, I could give you some of the hate that has been spewed at me, AT WORK, this week (and p.s. I work at an elementary) to use as taglines, but I really think you should put up “trolls give good taglines” for at least a month. I mean, give the hater some credit, right? 😉

  12. Alias Mother

    I have to confess that, having seen the “Winners do the math!” exchange as it happened, that tagline has made me laugh every time I stop by. That troll was of particular beauty, I thought.
    I understand the need for change, but I shall miss it.
    Maybe I should post it over my desk. You know, as inspiration

  13. Nicki

    I actually recently took a job in customer service, in part, for the tag lines. I get paid hourly to laugh at other people’s negativity. If I could figure a way to harness the crazies and bring them to my blog, I totally would. Unfortunately all I get are the plain janes. Snore.

Comments are closed.