The Birthday Gift That Keeps on Throbbing (and not in the good way, either.)

I’ve been trying to think of something to write for my obligatory “Birthday Post”. I wanted it to be funny, thought provoking, sad, and uplifting all at once.
I wanted it to be meaningful, something I’d look back on a year from now and feel The Joy deep down in my heart when I read it. I wanted people to link to it and talk about it on their blogs because OH MY GOD, I WISH I HAD WRITTEN THAT POST.
I’ve started and deleted at least 5 posts because I can not seem to get past the fact that last night, I sent my husband to Target to buy me something that I was told will clear up the problem that I have recently developed that is kind of ruining my life at the moment.
Late 30's SUCK.
Medicated Selsun blue
my sister told me
you will help clear the bacne.
Oh, late 30′s and your fucked up hormones, HOW I HATE YOU.
I guess this is as good as it’s going to get because at the moment, I can’t think of anything positive to say about turning 36 because I have zits on my back.

99 thoughts on “The Birthday Gift That Keeps on Throbbing (and not in the good way, either.)

  1. Kristen

    Hey. It could be back hair.
    But then I suppose Selsun Blue would make sure you didn’t have dandruff in it.
    Win win situation, I guess.
    Happy Birthday Kid.

  2. Mamacita

    Wait ’til you’re my age and you get a few liver spots among the zits. It’s lovely.
    You’re a fresh-hatched chick, a spring chicken, a babe-in-arms! Happy Birthday to one of my favorite (very young) people.

  3. RisibleGirl

    You might need to be on antibiotics. I had that issue once and hated it. Seems it was about 6 months into it that I developed a sinus infection and I swear to DOG, within a couple of days of being on antibiotics, the bacne cleared right up. I haven’t had a problem with it since (and I’m 47, so been there done that with the hormones).
    Happy birthday! (really! I hope it’s a great year for you)

  4. clickmom

    Happy Birthday.
    I gotta warn you, the perimenopause hormones really mess with ya. And thanks for the shampoo tip, I am going to try it out on my 14 year old son.

  5. Amy the Mom

    Happy Birthday! I feel your pain, although I don’t just get it on my back, I get it all over my decolletage-especially if it gets any kind of sun exposure. This year, I’ve had the added joy of getting it on my jawline and upper neck-I have no idea what’s up with that.

  6. Heather

    Happy Happy Day to you!
    34 with a side of 16 facial zits is driving me nutty. When I should be buying some anti-aging stuff I am instead trying every acne medication on the shelves!
    Wow I am sure looking forward to 36!

  7. Ginny

    Happy Birthday, Y! We are exactly 10 years and 9 days apart and, to me, you are a mere baby. Good luck with the bacne–I will never forget my friend’s response when I was griping about zits on my back–”Ewww…you get zits on your back?!” Some friend!

  8. superblondgirl

    Happy birthday!! Sorry about the bacne…. that’s rough. I’ve heard that the Neutrogena bodywash stuff works wonders, but who knows? Selsun may, too. Either way I hope it clears up fast for you.

  9. AA

    At least you can wear a shirt to cover the bacne. I now get these gi- huge-ic hard zit like volcanoes on may face, usually on my chin or forehead. Try covering that up. Really I am sympathetic. Just thought you might like to feel better being glad you are not me. Oh, and the odd tear inducing hormones that make me cry over stuff that no sane person woud be moved by.

  10. Jenna

    Happy Birthday!!
    If it makes you feel better, I have zits on my back too. This does not work for me since I have a wedding to go to in four weeks and my dress shows my back eek! I look forward to finding out if the Selsun Blue works on your back. Good luck!!

  11. Kira

    Dude. I was in a car accident this morning, and when we finally got to church a woman pointed at my forehead and said, “Oh was that from the accident?”
    Um, no. Just a massive zit, thanks. Yeah. Would you mind pointing out my abdominal bloating too? And we can move from there to my spider veins. GREAT.
    What I’m saying is, I feel ya.
    And happy birthday.

  12. DebbieS

    Happy Birthday Y!! (I didn’t know we were only 6 days apart!)
    I feel your pain…I have that dreaded wrinkle between my eyebrows (I call it “forehead cleavage”), and every other month or so I get a zit INSIDE the wrinkle.
    Think of it this way, if you didn’t have a little bacne, you would be too sexy and be totally unfair to all those 19 year-olds looking for Pighunters of their very own =)

  13. Michelle

    Happy Birthday to you!!!!
    I think I had maybe one pimple all through high school. Late 20′s till now and it appears that pimple puberty is catching up to me (I’m 36, too).
    My back clears up with a little stratigic sun exposure. Yeah, I know it’s bad for you and all, but I don’t bake myself. When I’m outside, I just wear a tank top with my hair up.

  14. Suzy Q

    Have you tried some body wash or scrub with salicylic acid in it? Like Clean and Clear, or even the CVS brand is good. I got this tip from your friend, Amalah. It helps.
    Plus, I don’t understand how dandruff shampoo could help with bacne. Menthol on acne? Yeowch.

  15. MotherFury

    Happy Birthday, Y!!
    I’m not sure if you are going to use the Selsun on your back or your head… But I can tell you from long term personal experience with acne, your shampoo/conditioner could be causing the problem. If you’re using anything that has that “pro vitamin b” (Pantene, Finesse, etc.) stuff in it… stop using it. Switch to something simple, without a lot of additives (not dove or ivory) and wash your back with liquid dial soap. Better yet, get your *husband* to wash your back with the soap and a wash cloth – nothing scratchy. ;-)

  16. Shelley

    Happy Birthday Y….bacne or no bacne!
    Hey, just consider yourself lucky that you don’t have buttcne! lol
    Happy Birthday to you….
    Happy Birthday to you….
    Happy Birthday dear Y….
    Happy Birthday to you!!!
    Much love,

  17. FlippyO

    Yeah, I would think just having your hair up for a while, going in the pool (dries it out), and getting a little sun on your back would do the trick.
    Regardless, 36 is the new 21. Enjoy!

  18. Suz

    Happy Birthday Y! I know 35 sucked hard for you. Here’s hoping, despite the bacne, that 36 is an awesome year! Have a great birthday and do something fun to celebrate!

  19. Amber

    Hey Y, Happy Birthday. :) I know late but i haven’t been on. I don’t know how to get rid of your bacne but i will say one thing, i get upset at each of my birthdays thinking im getting OLD, but ya know what, If i can be as beautiful, smart & hilarious as you at 36 I can’t wait….Only 12 more years! Happy birthday to a wonderful woman! :)

  20. Amanda Brown

    At least you can cover up bacne with a shirt. What am I supposed to do about the THIRD EYE that has sprouted on my forehead? What? I ask. Face zits are way worse, birthday girl.
    Hope the selsun works and that you had a great birthday!

  21. kheatherg

    My Bday was yesterday, WE are Virgo’s!
    Are you a pysco, planning, crazy, anxiety driven beyotch, like me too?

  22. Alison

    Copy! That is my birthday too! I turned 31 yesterday, so I guess I’m really the copy cat.
    Anyway, happy birthday fellow virgo! I hope the bacne clears right up!

  23. Janice

    Okey dokey. I’m 45 and I have the same issue along with some on my face, chest and ass. Lucky lucky me. Hormones suck.
    Happy Birthday!!!

  24. donnah

    If you have a health food store around see if they carry a soap with tea tree oil. It’s pricey but my son uses it during football season when his helmet causes really bad breakouts and it really works.

  25. Nette

    I have suffered w/ bacne since I was 12. I’m now 35 and have tried everything in the book, including incredibly strong prescription creams that made my skin peel off (but left the bacne where it stood).
    I recently found this product, and am at the very least less embarrassed of my back, and far less uncomfortable from cysts.
    http://www.amazon.com/Clean-Clear-Advantage-Cleanser-5-Ounce/dp/B000FU0S2K/ref=rsl_mainw_dpl/104-9878820-5656755?ie=UTF8&m=ATVPDKIKX0DER
    Clean and Clear Advantage (not the Continous Control, that just broke me out more. And Neutrogena Clear body wash gave me horrible rashes all over).
    Sorry, didn’t mean to make this post all about me LOL.
    And Happy Birthday, Y! I don’t know that I’ve ever posted to you before, but you make me laugh every day.

  26. Tiff

    I know this is totally disgusting, but a couple years ago I had this huge zit on my back and I made my mom pop it because it hurt. About a gallon of puss came out. It was green. And it freaking stank like a dead animal. And the puss squirted in my mom’s eye.
    Happy Birthday!

  27. candace

    ok, bacne sucks but hormones raging is a good thing! Welcome to your prime. I got here 2 months ago and I feel hornier for sure. Even with the zits and random long face hairs………
    happy birthday!

  28. jesseeezmom

    HAPPY BRITHDAY!! WOO HOO FOR YOU!
    Selsun Blue must be magic! My daughter had spots on her arms and the Dr. prescribed $80 medicine not covered by insurance, so she suggested Selsun Blue as an alternative- it worked for her and hopefully for you too birthday girl! Girl’s bodies do crazy things as we get older! Yikes! I will definitely take a Selson Blue recomendation over a Depend’s recomendation any day!! Love you Y!

  29. gorillabuns

    36 is better than 38. at least what i remember of 36. you feel like you can totally handle 36. you are not 40 yet, it’s totally in the distance, somewhere. now, i’m so close to 40, i want to cry. not because of the age but because i’m totally afraid i’ll be fat for my 40th and that’s what really depresses me.
    anyway, this was really supposed to be about you, right? not me.
    sorry,
    HOPE YOUR BIRTHDAY WAS WONDERFUL!!! HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!!!

  30. ela

    HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY
    HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY
    HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY
    HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY
    HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY
    HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY
    Birthday, Y!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    (at 42 – I hope I can at least remember that 6×6 is 36!)

  31. Mom101

    A fellow Virgo! I knew I loved you right away.
    (Also, I’m having trouble commenting on your last post – my heart goes out to you Y. )

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