If I title this post “Boozer the Loser” would you still read my blog? No? Ok, then I’ll title it “Oh Shit! This is Really Happening” instead.

Only 14 days left until we are officially “Homeless.”
No, we have not found a place yet.
Yes, we are looking.
No, I have not got a job yet.
Yes, I am looking.
(Apparently, no one wants to hire a 35 year old whose only experience listed on her resume is “worked with kids for 15 years!” I can’t imagine why not! Seriously.)
No, I am not going to BlogHer.
Yes, I really wanted to go. But, the whole “we’re homeless” thing has kind of ruined those plans. But you have fun without me, ya’hear!?

No, I have not yet had a single glass of the super sized bottle of sangria that PigHunter surprised me with 3 weeks ago because it was on sale for $5.99 and he wanted a blow job.
Yes, that will all change tonight as soon as the kids go to bed. (And by “that” I mean, the bottle will finally be open and consumed, NOT that PigHunter will be getting that blow job he thought he’d get 3 weeks ago because he bought me a cheap bottle of Sangria.)

26 thoughts on “If I title this post “Boozer the Loser” would you still read my blog? No? Ok, then I’ll title it “Oh Shit! This is Really Happening” instead.

  1. Mary

    Hi Y! Daycares, although they pay pretty crappy, are ALWAYS looking for people. Best part- free (or VERY discounted) daycare for the little one! Good luck with your moving.. We are moving to our first house (apartment right now!) at the end of June and we will both be gone for 20 days before it happens- and then have 6 to get all packed and moved. Seeing all your boxes made me a little light headed! Still, LOVE YOUR BLOG.

  2. demondoll

    I’m with you- yes to Sangria. No to bj while in the middle of packing. Unless you have the policy of pack a box= get a bed prezzie…

  3. Jerri Ann

    I am so sorry but you know that bottle of Sangria will surely make it seem better anyway…and the blowjob might get you a little action that will surely make you feel better

  4. Kimberly

    Oh Y, there’s all your stuff!!! I’m sad for you, so you don’t have to be sad alone. But you are no loser, chickie, or else we wouldn’t be here with you!!
    It cracks me up that you clarified what exactly was changing tonight because I was wondering as I read it. :) Here’s to you, your family, your cheap sangria, and a you-scratch-my-back-I-scratch-yours policy in da bedroom. :)

  5. anne nahm

    Holy hell, Y, I feel your pain. Remember when I emailed you and was like, ‘girl, just chill – our landlord is trying to sell our house too and it ain’t never gonna happen?”
    We might be homeless twins! Our last day is May 6th and we don’t have a place to go either. Crap. We haven’t even started packing. But you know what? I’ve seen a lifetimes worth of fugly houses. Hope we both get something soon.

  6. Dawn

    Listen, I am sure you are slightly exaggerating about the resume that just says “worked with kids the last 15 years.” But in case you’re not — stop! You need to upgrade that resume girl. You are a writer and a businesswoman. Without formal training, you have created this site, gone to conferences to improve your skills, gone on media junkets, created success through a network of skills. This is SOMETHING, Y. I look at it and envy your creativity and commitment, and as a manager who needs an employee, think “If she lived here, I would be calling her right now about a job.” Don’t sell yourself short. You are awesome.

  7. Helen

    Here’s the homeless triplet! I am dry heaving in fear right along with you, I think though, that I hate your landlord even more than I hate mine because at least mine gave us 8 weeks notcie with a ‘ we have somewhere else you can go for 6 months if you’re desperate’ clause. May your new home be a palace with beautiful kitchen cupboards and a fair landlord. Helen.

  8. Kyla

    Y!?!?!?!?! No BlogHer? *sob*
    Seriously? I was so looking forward to meeting THE Y FROM THE INTERNETS.
    I hope you guys find a place soon and life calms down for you all.

  9. Kristin

    Oh, Y. The red tape seems somehow metaphoric but my tired brain is just not getting there. If it helps, when I moved in October I was mostly packed before I found my great place, and I just have a feeling that’s what’s going to happen for you, too. It will be all right.

  10. jenny

    i have 6 days until i move. do i have anything packed? oh sure..just the stuff that i never unpacked *L* *says a prayer*

  11. Danielle

    I’m so sorry. We just moved last July. It was a planned move but painful. We had to stay with our Inlaws for a few weeks. The five people of my family in two small bedrooms living out of suitcases with all of our boxes in the garage. It was very motivating to find a place fast.
    The best news is that even though that sucked so bad we now have a wonderful place that I love.
    I’m so hoping that you find that soon.
    I wish that I could hug you. Maybe we can have an offical NotAbleToAffordBlogHerThisYear online conference. I’ll drink to that.

  12. Tracy

    Ok, am I the ONLY person bugged by the fact that the box marked glass is upside down?
    (See, be happy – you could be packing and moving with *MY* neurosis and OCD. My poor husband…)

  13. Lotta

    You are goning to be FINE Y! You are going to find a nice little house, a job you like and your kids are going to find new friends in a blink of a pigs eye. I can see it all in my magic crystal ball, see! Now, enjoy your wine! *cheers*

  14. Kait

    I’m sorry to hear that you haven’t found a place yet. That must be so frustrating. I hope that something comes up quickly so you can rest a little easier.

  15. Deb

    I’m sorry you’ve not found a place or job yet.
    Here in my area, we have Health Support Technicians that work with the school system. Hired by the County health system. We work the same hours that the kids go to school. Basic CPR and first aid training. They provide it. Maybe there is something similiar in your area? Alot of our HSTs were stay at home moms.

  16. carrisa

    I’m still holding out hope that you will go to BlogHer. I want to see the worm in person. And maybe do some body shots off your boobs.
    You never know… someone could offer to sponsor you. Or your dream house could appear next week and well… miracles happen. So I’m keeping hope alive.

  17. Creative Freakin' Genius

    I stumbled here after a visit to Attention Whore’s blog-o-rama. I had a completely craptastic week that continued thru until last night when I had a knock-down, drag-out bawl-fest. Why the heck am I telling you this??? So you can truly appreciate how terribly I needed to laugh. I love the fact that PH bought you a bottle of booze thinkin’ he was going to get a BJ ( is he living in 1986 or is it just ME? ). HA! Thanks a billion!

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