Update

I’ve made a baby registry for Stacey. I called her to make sure it was ok with her. She was very thankful and I told her I’ll be keeping in touch in case they move her, so I can make sure anything purchased is sent to the right place.
Baby registry.
If you can’t buy from the wishlist but you have things you want to send (and I know some of you do, I’ve read your emails and will be responding very shortly) to her on your own, like pampers/clothing for her or her kids/personal items, I’ll send you her P.O Box info.
I love you guys for being so concerned and generous. I KNOW people are pretty much spent, so the fact that so many of you have responded is awesome. Thank you. So SO much.
**UPDATED**
I have a reader who lives in SA. She called Stacey this morning, then called me back with some GOOD NEWS. Stacey got an apartment! And? She’ll still be getting everything that’s sent to her P.O Box, so no worries there. I called her immediately after hanging up with Nicole. I told her there were gifts on the way and that I’d keep the word out about her other children. They are getting help with furniture, but They NEED clothing and baby things. They do not need toys, the kids have toys. OH OH and? I didn’t realize she has THREE children. A 2 year old girl. So, the clothing sizes she needs are as follows. Size 3/4t girl/ Size 8 boy/ Size 7slim girl and size 16/18 womens.
She sounds a little, um, leary (sp?) about all of the help but I don’t blame her, I told her that I completely understand if she’s a bit freaked out about all of these strangers wanting to help her, but I asked her to trust me that we’re Good People who just want to help her and her children. I can’t thank you all enough for your help.

27 thoughts on “Update

  1. Y

    One can never be sure, now, can they?
    but, I KNOW I’m not. This woman that I met, she didn’t approach me to ask for anything, she was just telling me about her experience (as a volunteer nurse) in the shelters in San Antonio. She told me of the people she’s met and how she’s called the mayor and the la times to get these people help. She then told me of this lady stacey. I’m the one that asked HER if I could help in any way. That is when she said she’d give me her cell phone number. And? I’ve emailed the nurse and talked on the phone several times to Stacey.
    How would they be “scamming me?” They didn’t ask for anything, I asked. And? It’s not “my parade” I’m trying to help a woman who’s lost her husband and all of her earthly possessions and is about to have a baby.

  2. jesse

    no one is going to walk up to you and say i am a scam artist …. listen to my story ..
    rather than help one person collect all you can and donate it to your favorite charity that would help so many more .
    one can not put too much faith intoo his/her fellow humanbeing

  3. Y

    Um, did you read what I wrote?
    She didn’t ask me for anything. She was walking away and I approached her, telling her I had school supplies I could give if she needed them.
    And what exactly is she scamming for? Baby wipes and pampers?
    Seriously. I’m not stupid, I’ve spoken to both women. Thanks for your concern, but I am going with my gut on this one.

  4. Y

    Oh and one more thing.
    I have collected things to be distributed to people. I’ve helped collect TONS of school supplies, and I was able to get my local post off ice to collect things as well and I’ll be shipping them all off to a friend in houston who will deliver them personally.
    This one woman isn’t the only person I’m trying to help, but having been pregnant 3 times, I feel drawn to make sure SHE gets what she needs for the baby.

  5. jesse

    i feel compelled to help as you do … i have a friend that lives in slidell LA and was greatly affected by the storm .
    i am certian that we will hear stories of people with good intentions being takeing advantage of . i hope that yours is not one of them.
    i am not being critical of your intentions .i am just trying to offer you something to consider before you or your well intended internet friends take a blind leap of trust .

  6. Y

    And I appreciate that you’re concerned, you just have to trust me on this. I mean, I could see if we were giving money and such, but it’s mostly baby clothes and such. ANd like I said, I spoke to stacey, it’s for real.

  7. suzie

    it’s hard, but sometimes you just have to believe in people, and i trust your “gut”. (hee, never thought that’s a phrase i’d type) i think you did a great thing here. thanks for setting up the registery.
    if you ARE being scammed then the scammer just scored blankets, onesies and healthcare items from me. the “scammer” will be THRILLED, because we all know what a high street value THOSE have.
    again, you’re doing a good thing here.

  8. Jessica

    well, all i know is i felt just as compelled. I was sitting here the other night after one of the benefit concerts i saw on tv, and i was feeling so depressed because i can not afford to send a decent money donation or go down there and help out. we are in pittsburgh, paand my brother left 2 weeks ago with a group of firefighters to help out. i am working on getting my son’s cubscout pack together to collect money to send to the red cross. other than that i couldn’t think of a whole lot i could do that would really make a difference.
    after reading your post about Stacey, i knew that if all i could do personally was make a small difference in this one family, that would be 100% more than i thought i could do. it wasn’t much but i did send her something from your baby registry. that was an awesome idea!! she now will have a great little fleece wrap for when it’s cooler. thanks so much for the opportunity.
    oh, and i can’t imagine someone would scam people out of baby items. i mean, come on, if they were going to scam you, they would have tried to get something a little more versatile than baby items. and if it is a scam… who cares. the fact is, we are all trying to help in any way we can. and yeah, it can help more people if we just sent money to the red cross or collected school supplies (which i gather you are really doing well with) but obviously, the things that everyone across the country is sending isn’t getting to Stacey… or many many others. everyone keeps saying that we should all do whatever is in our power to help. well this was something that was in your power to do and something that is in our power to help you do. it may be a small thing in comparison to what some people are doing, but for the rest of her life and the lives of her children, this will be the biggest, most wonderful thing anyone has done for her. that’s because a perfect stranger who certainly didn’t have money to throw around loved her and her children without even knowing them, and this is just one example of how love can move mountains. i am so happy that i could be a part of your enormous generosity. thank you, yvonne.

  9. Y

    Damn. I didnt realize that. I don’t know how else to get it to her. UNLESS I can talk my friend into having it shipped to her house and actually taking it to her. Hmmmmmm. Ignore what I said in my email, sometimes I’M REALLY STUPID.

  10. FlippyO

    If you’d said, “Throw it really really high up into the air and maybe it’ll blow over to where she’s staying”, that might’ve been stupid. What you said wasn’t stupid. 🙂

  11. Michelle

    Ok- I just spent a good chunk of time going through stuff so I’ve got quite a few clothes ranging up to one year old for a baby girl- some shoes to throw in as well. If it won’t cost me an arm and a leg, I have a barely used bassinet to send as well. When is she due? What about shoe sizes on the older kids? For her? Hook me up with her address when you have a chance.

  12. Fiona

    FlippyO i tried to send the Gerber set too!!!
    Ok, i’ve done my shopping for Stacey….i took some items from your list Yvonne and added some of the more practical things like a supply of diapers and wipes, etc.
    Then i was thinking…these lovely boxes will arrive for the baby and the two other children will have nothing…so i went back and did a little more shopping for some clothes for the girl and boy
    reading about the possibility of this being a ‘scam’ saddened me….over the years i’ve helped various people online, from paying a month of rent to fixing a car, to helping someone who’s car was going to be repossessed…hell i even got someone a ticket to phantom of the opera in london after the online b/f she went to visit there refused to have anything to do with her
    i’m like that…i trust and i try to help and if that trust is misplaced so be it….i like to think it’s not,and that i can make someone’s day a little brighter, safer, something-er
    thank you yvonne for sharing that sort of trust….without you we’d not have been able to help stacey and as it has been said, to directly help just one person in all this is something at least
    i’ve given to all sorts of relief efforts over the past few weeks, from babies to adults to animals and if even half of it found itself to the right place, i can sleep a little better at night knowing i didn’t turn my back or become cynical
    as someone else said….’GO YVONNE’!!!!!
    love, hugs, all that good stuff *S*
    Fiona

  13. Vickie

    SJ, I saw no “arguing” going on by Jesse. He/she offered up commentary and even said they weren’t attempting to start up shit or be critical. Yvonne responded back (and by the way, I’ve seen plenty of blogs where criticism, constructive or not, is offered and the writer of the blog lashes out like a caged rabid animal at the criticism) and she responded back so that the two of them had basically a conversation about something and it appeared to be resolved.
    Not to get involved myself, but it annoys the shit out of me when people feel like they always have to run to the defense of the writer of the blog. In this case, there sure wasn’t any need to.
    The comment immediately above your own certainly showed that it was over.

  14. heatherg

    I agree with Vickie. It was a conversation that Y and Jesse had, and it was resolved.
    Also though, Let me say- I think Jesse was justified in saying something, she said the same thing that went through everyone’s head at least once. We are lucky, hence Y actually spoke to someone and can confirm all the details.
    Facts remain, there are going to be some scammers out there. Again, we are simply lucky that Y spoke with someone, confirmed things, and now we are all able to help with open hearts.

  15. trish

    I live in Houston and I am depressed at being able to help only a little. We can only donate so much (I have bills of my own to pay), so if volunteering to help just one family is all someone can do, then I think it’s great. I have seen many people who live near me doing nothing, so the fact that you’re in Cali doing so much is admirable, Yvonne. Sometimes all we can do is trust our instincts.

  16. Kristina

    Y,
    My payday comes up soon and I will also be shipping some stuff out if you want to email me the PO box address. I have lots of newborn baby girl clothes that most of which Megan never wore and are just going to get put into salvation army if I don’t give them away. I just ran across the two boxes yesterday after I had already donated all their other clothes. I have some clothes of the boy, but not the girl I don’t have any girls that age. Though I can send a few stuff, I’ll just go buy them. It shouldn’t be a problem at all and I’m happy to help. The thing about it is, if you get scammed at least you know that your intentions were well and good and this isn’t money exchanging hands so it’s all good to me.

  17. Jennifer

    Y,
    Your heart is so big, and always in the right place. Bless you for helping this woman…she will be so pleasantly surprised! I cannot imagine suddenly losing my husband, having 2 children already and one on the way…with NOTHING…CANNOT imagine that.

  18. Mieke

    This is terrific Y. I’ll spread the word. With regard to the chance this may be a scam, my attitude is that if this woman needs help buying clothes for her children and herself, regardless of the cause, and we have a chance to help who gives a crap. We have a responsibility to each other and try to help ease the suffering of the other whether it’s because of a hurricane, being born poor, or escaping an abusive husband.
    I love your tender heart.
    Also regarding the P.O. Box, a lot of the private PO Boxes have street addresses you can use as well. Find out if Stacy’s is at an actual Post Office or some mailboxes etc…

  19. Amy

    Personally, in this kind of situation, I would rather take the risk of being “scammed” then not help would very likely could be a person in extreme need. Of course there is always the possibility that good intentions will be taken advantage of–but for me, that is not enough to keep me from acting.
    For the one time I’m scammed, I’ve actually helped at least 10 times.

  20. reese

    I like that you trust your instinct and heart on this. OFten, if we listen to our hearts, they’ll tell us when someone in genuinely in need. Clearly, your heart knows this woman needs help.
    Interestingly, I find it more difficult to give to “large” charities (not some of the smaller churches, etc but the big names) because I worry so muchof my $ will get eaten up by administrative crap. Or a half million dollar paycheck to the agencies director. But you get someone like this, like Stacey, and the stuff is going directly TO her. And it’s not money–it’s actual physical things she and her children can use. To me it’s so rewarding to see a family or person be the direct recepient of that kind of goodness. The large charities have a very important purpose, but personally I’d like to give through things like this.
    Since I am in canada, I can’t send stuff easily. I read in one of the comments someof the items on the registry can’t be sent to the PO Box. Can you email me to let me know how I can send them to Melly or someone else to help out Stacey? I’d like to order a thing or two off the registry if possible. 🙂

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