Today I made my first real attempt to fix Gabby’s hair all pretty. As you can see, it didn’t turn out very pretty at all.
She was standing in her crib, I was standing facing her, with no shirt on, just a bra. A nursing bra. A nursing bra with snaps in the front.
As I attempted to put the baretts in her hair, she was attempting a little experiment of her own. The girl was trying to figure out how to how to unsnap the bra.
She grabbed. She grunted. She pulled. She grunted some more. And then, finally… “POP!” And out came the boob.
She let out the loudest “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE” I’ve ever heard and did a little victory dance. (Which I have to admit, was totally precious)
She got lucky, I thought.
Yeah, right. As soon as I snapped it back up and resumed combing her hair, she unsnapped it again.
“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE” She squeeled, again.
“I’m trying to make you look pretty, you big stinky! Leave my boobs alone! PLEASE! Stop the insanity!”
Psh. As if. “POP”.
That was it. The girl had figured out “the system” and she wasn’t going to stop. I went and put a shirt on.
Gabby didnt’ like that. At all.
“You won’t leave my boobs alone, I’m not going to fix your hair pretty. You get to go to the doctors with jacked up hair!”
SO TAKE THAT, LITTLE BRA UNSNAPPER!
I had a revelation as she was ripping my bra off. Infact my inner voice spoke to me. “I think it’s time you wean the girl, because, it’s only a matter of time before she starts ripping your shirt off in public whilst screaming ‘I WANT BOOBIE NOW!!'”
Gabby’s pediatrician told me it might be time to start weaning her and start introducing her to whole milk (and I didn’t even tell her about the bra incident!) She’s not gained much weight since the last visit and she said that it could be because my milk supply is dwindling.
I think she might be right, but I’m not sure about the whole milk thing before a year. She said it’s ok, as long as I introduce it slowly. I want to believe her, but I noticed she doesn’t wash her hands for 30 seconds, which leads me to believe she doesn’t watch Oprah.
And really, what kind of a mother would I be if I trusted the opinion of someone who doesn’t watch Oprah?