It was a lizard! And it was IN MY HOUSE!
How did a lizard THAT BIG get inside of my house? Did he open the door and let himself in? Because, how does a creature of that size get into a house without someone noticing? Is there a hole in a wall somewhere that I should know about? Am I going to wake up and find a possum taking a dump in my toilet?
But, seriously, folks…
HOW DID HE GET IN MY HOUSE?