Little in the middle but she got much branch

We’re getting ready to go get our great fun. This probably is my LEAST favorite thing about Christmas. I’m all for a fake tree, but Tony don’t play that. I will go inspite of my hatred for great fun shopping because the ONE year I decided I’d stay home and trust Tony to find a decent tree is the one year I ended up with a piece of shit tree with an entire middle section missing. I swore to myself I would never let that happen again. Funny thing is, this year? I WANT to get an ugly tree so that I can teach my boys about finding beauty in things that are percieved as ugly to the world. I thought I’d get all “deep and shit” and teach them that beauty comes from within and that with a little love, an ugly tree can become a beautiful thing. But that’s, like, even too cheesy for ME to stand. And I have a high tolerance for cheese.
So, off to deal with The Ignorants and The Assholes of this town in search of a pretty tree that we’ll waste AT LEAST $60.00 on only to throw it out a few days later.
Merry effin Christmas.

12 thoughts on “Little in the middle but she got much branch

  1. Shylah

    I used to be all bent on having a real tree, too, but last year taught me that small children and pokey-tree-needles are not compatible. That, and I’m sick of throwing out my tinsel every year. So I got a big ol’ fake tree this year and I love it.

  2. girl

    I can’t believe how expensive tree have gotten! I remember picking out trees at the tree farm with my stepdad when I was a kid and then were about $20-$30 tops for a really nice tree.

  3. dana michelle

    I’m a real tree person, 100%. Every year my boyfriend and I drive up north to his family’s lake cottage, to visit our favorite tree farm (in Waushara County, WI, Christmas Tree Capital of the World) and cut down our own trees. I got a beautiful balsam fir for only $28. When you cut your own, they are so fresh that they last much longer, too.
    One of the *few* perks of living up here in the frozen North this time of year ;)

  4. LaDonna

    I’m all for real trees, but I would never waste $60 bucks. Every year we get our $10 permits from the Colorado State Forest Service. We make a whole day of it. The men get to tramp around out in the woods finding the trees while my friend and I get a chance to visit, then we have a nice dinner somewhere before heading home. It’s one of the highlights of our year.

  5. Jeremy

    Normally I am all for a real tree but I got sick and tired of cleaning up the damnable needles and gettin them stuck in my feet, so last year we went as fake as Pam Andersons boobies!

  6. stinkerbelle

    i love real trees but hate having to haul it to the dump every year. needles everywhere. so last year i bought a light tree. we’re using it again this year. and on this island trees were sold out two weeks ago. i just heard on the news tonight that trees airfreighted in to honolulu were going for $165. seems last year vendors had to dump trees cuz sales were bad. this year they brought in fewer trees and they were snapped up. some people are even ordering trees to be delivered via UPS or Fed-Ex.

  7. Kathy Howe

    I don’t have a tree up yet. We have a fake one – which I hate so I was thinking I’d get a real one. So far the kids don’t seem to care if we get one so why the hell should *I* care since I’m the one that has to put it up and take it down anyways.
    We have lights on a large potted tree in the den and a wreath on the door.
    Ho-fucking-Ho. Is it the 26th yet?

  8. Milk and Pepsi

    Wow are those REAL????

    I keep hearing that this year, fake Christmas trees are growing in popularity. People find them easier to deal with, I suppose. For me though, only real will do. Growing up my parents always had this one fake Christmas tree….

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