I have a confession…
I got an epidural.
I know I said I’d never get one and I meant it at the time. I didn’t get one with either of my boys. I just hate needles too much.
But this labor was totally different. First of all, it was so damn long. 24 hours. And the pain? Well, it was bearable until the very end. The contractions got so strong that they never eased up. It was a constant pain and pressure and I tried to deal, but I couldn’t. I started to cry and scream for someone to help me. That’s when I screamed.
“I WANT AN EPIDURAL… NOW!”
They gave me one and I will admit that the pain from the needle wasn’t half as bad as I had imagined it would be. However…
It did absolutely NOTHING for me because I had waited too long to get it. They checked me right after they had it in and I was already dialted to 9 and within minutes I was pushing.
I could still feel everything. I remember people saying you couldn’t feel your legs or the urge to push. Yeah, whatever, I still had the pain and I could feel everything happening to me down there. The doctor said I waited too long to get it.
What a waste.
I was a little upset at myself for getting it, I felt like a wimp, but after 23 hours of all of that pain, and then getting the never ending contraction from hell, my body just couldn’t take it anymore.
There was one little snippet of my labor that I wanted to tell everyone about. When I was having that never ending contraction and was experiencing unbearable pain, I would blow air to try to release the tension in my body. Tony was trying to help, but there wasn’t much he could do. At one point when I was blowing and crying and begging God to make it stop, Tony looked me right in the eye and said “Whew, baby, you need a breath mint!! I’m going to go see if I can get you some.”
Ok, men? Don’t ever say that to a women in the last stages of her labor. EVER.
I grabbed his arm and I told him that I DIDN’T NEED A FUCKING BREATH MINT. and that if he left to get me one, I would kill him.
5 minutes later, he was shoving one in my mouth. I spit it out and tried to punch him.
I love that man, but there are times I question how much he values his cock because he says the stupidest things.
I am grateful he was there with me trying to help though. And even now, when he gets home from work, he’s right here helping me in anyway I can. He can see that I’m not doing so great these past couple of days. The lack of sleep has finally caught up to me and my body feels like shit. I don’t have pain, but I did start bleeding again and I feel like the walking dead. I try to nap when she does, but it’s impossible with the boys home. They never shut up and they never leave my side. They don’t want to go outside and play anymore, they just want to stay inside and “HELP” me. It’s driving me crazy, but I can’t get mad at them for it. I think my life will be so much easier once they go back to school, which is only 15 days away.
I just hope I don’t crash and burn before then.