I was talking to my friend right now and somehow we started talking about farts.
She swears that she has never once farted in front of her husband. They’ve been married for 14 years.
I said “BULLSHIT.”
She says she just can’t do it.
Ok, what the fuck, seriously? It’s completely and totally natural. I mean, I know I take farting to new extremes, I have gas every other hour, but how the fuck does one control her ass muscles that well for FOURTEEN YEARS? And furthermore, why the hell would you want to? It’s a fricken’ fart, who cares? Of course, no one wants to fart in public, but at home, in the comfort of your own home? I am not holding back for shit if I have to fart, it feels good to just let go.
Infact, in our house, we comment on each fart made, like, “that one sounded like a machine gun” or “that sounded like a frog” Or the most used one “someone stepped on a duck.”
I just don’t believe her that she’s never farted in front of him.
Take that, miss priss.