I think I found a use for all that duct tape.

I got attacked by a spider a few nights ago and you should see the size of the bite marks!! The bites got somewhat infected and swollen, I have about 4 of them, anyway, I was telling my husband I don’t know how a spider that big could have bitten me and escaped without me finding it and his response was this… “You probably ate it.”
Excuse me?
So he goes on to tell me the average human will swallow something like 3-8 spiders in their lifetime while sleeping?!!? I had never heard of this before and I wish I never had…
Seriously, how can I ever sleep again?

28 thoughts on “I think I found a use for all that duct tape.

  1. Joelle

    Nnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
    NO! Damn you for telling me that! I’m so afraid of spiders…now I’m going to go to bed tonight with a surgical mask on like freakin’ Michael Jackson.

  2. Dania

    yup, it’s true. Don’t ask me how they came to this conclusion, but can you imagine if you actually did eat the spider that bit you, I mean if you can see the fang marks it must have been HUGE…and prolly furry.
    hehehehe

  3. Tracy

    DAMNIT…now I have that song in my head.
    “There once was a lady who swallowed a spider…
    It wriggled and wiggled and jiggled inside her…
    She swallowed the spider to catch the fly
    I don’t know why she swallowed the fly…
    Perhaps she’ll die!”
    I had a spider crawl across my face once…I didn’t sleep for the rest of the night, and for the next week I slept on the floor!

  4. Jenn

    Too funny ! My husband told my teenage daughter that about a year ago, and she tried to sleep with tape on her mouth for a month..he he he

  5. gojou

    It’s true: the average person eats eight spiders in his/her lifetime.
    Yvonne, don’t you think there is a certain symmetry in your eating the spider that bit the shit out of you? Payback’s a bitch…better to be giving than receiving.
    J: I’ll protect you from those nasty ole’ spiders. 😉

  6. Mister Mittens

    Yvonne,
    I�m not sure if I would believe that number, it really depends on the size and furriness of the spiders; cause it much harder to swallow a large furry spider in comparison to a small �shaved� spider. The slippery ones go down much easer.
    What you really want to be careful of is them laying their eggs in your body orifices. That�s when things can get real bad; just picture all those hungry baby spiders hatching in your ear, and your dinner�
    [Mister Mittens � One creepy pussy]

  7. jay

    Just for the record: I prefer mine chocolate coated. And ya know if you tape your mouth they will just crawl in your ears… tape your ears and they will crawl somwhere else. =]

  8. KB

    Maybe you’ll gained superhuman strength and the ability to spin a “psi-web” of psionic energy between two surfaces…

  9. statia

    I know, thank god I sleep on my stomach. I guess I shouldn’t tell you that there are little tiny microscopic bugs living in your bed…. all the time. You can’t get rid of them.
    Oh, I guess I just did.

  10. Deltus

    To put some salve on this mental wound, that “statistic” sounds entirely made-up (not suggesting your husband made it up, just that it probably was). Wouldn’t it depend on if you tend to sleep with your mouth open or closed? And on geographical area, to having easily-swallowed spiders? Wouldn’t it vary based on your house (how bug-filled it is, etc.)?
    You know, 57.3% of all “statistics” are made up on the spot…

  11. RJC

    talking about bugs on ur bed, did you know that you have microscopic bugs living on ur face, that eat the fluid inside ur skin cells. you can’t get rid of them, on top of that, they were given to you by your mum when she breast fed you…
    hm….

  12. hiohoiho

    i saw a spider crawl across my pillow once i think i fucken sawlowd it!
    Thats so fricken gross
    i coverd my mouth in duck tape for the rest of the night and the reast of the year!

  13. hiohoiho

    i saw a spider crawl across my pillow once i think i fucken sawlowd it!
    Thats so fricken gross
    i coverd my mouth in duck tape for the rest of the night and the reast of the year!

  14. hiohoiho

    i saw a spider crawl across my pillow once i think i fucken sawlowd it!
    Thats so fricken gross
    i coverd my mouth in duck tape for the rest of the night and the reast of the year!

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